Flashback to Pregnancy

I was scrolling through some posts I never got around to publishing while I was pregnant and I stumbled across this one.  I wrote briefly about stuff related to my feeling in this post after the babies had arrived, and I had forgotten that I had written this.  I still miss being pregnant, but I am so happy my babies are here now.  I truly can’t imagine my life without them now.  Most of all, I am happy that I have been able to relax a bit after the first few emotional weeks of desiring control over everything pertaining to the babies (sorry Nick, I know I was a handful).



Recently, knowing that the babies will be here in less than 3 weeks, I have been having quite the whirlwind of emotions.  While I am beyond excited to finally meet these babies that I have been growing, I find myself a little sad that the pregnancy portion of this journey is going to end.

Right now, I feel like I can protect these babies from everything bad.  Sure I may eat too much sugar sometimes or not drink enough water on occasion, but for the most part I am providing them the best environment I know how.  Once they are born into this world I can no longer protect them from everything, and that feels a little scary sometimes.

Right now, I get to be the only one to carry these babies.  As selfish as it sounds, I love knowing where my babies are, right in my belly.  I can feel them move around and be assured that they are safe.  I get to be the only one to feel them move late at night when I wake up to use the bathroom.  I am the only one that can hold them right now, and some part of me is sad to give that up.  I can’t wait to see Nick hold them, but for now, I love that the babies and I share moments together that no one else gets to be a part of.

I love these babies so much already and I know upon meeting them I will wonder how I ever lived without them, but for now I really love that I get to hold them in my belly and keep them safe.


And just because this is a flashback post, here is a picture of that big ol belly I had.





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